Hey all, I know it’s been a minute and I deeply apologize on not being more vocal on this matter. If you do benefit from my post please let me know in the comment section or on Facebook! I would greatly appreciate it. I know most of you are wondering about the title and I will explain why.
I had two cycles in June which is normal for me, So July I decided to try and track my ovulation just for fun. So my husband and I match the dates and had our fingers crossed that we made the deadline (I’m keeping this post rated E) So July 19 was a very important moment.. I got a slight positive on a home pregnancy test!! you guys could only image the joy that over came my family, But we knew that we should wait longer to better our odds. On that notion, I also notified my doctor and he instructed me to do a pee test for them.. which I did. Then the results came back negative. I figured it was still too early even though the 10 tests I took at home was positive. Around the 24th, I tested again and it was still slightly positive; that was when I missed my cycle. The doctor order a blood test, and once again it came back negative. My heart was broken but still so confused. I chalked it up to the game and went on with life. I went Las Vegas and enjoyed myself… But during my fun I had a very light cycle which was rare for me. When I returned home it had stopped. So, I decided why not take a test (YOLO right?) well… to my surprise it came back slightly positive… (more clearer than last month) I was very confused and yet excited that we may still have beat all odds. So yesterday I went for a blood test again. As I patiently waited all day today, I got the call (the call that would change my family’s whole world) The doctor said “I’m sorry to inform you..but the results were negative” That’s when I realized something wasn’t right. I asked her for explanation. She said that my condition could make false hormones. Due to the cysts all around my ovaries, one can grow with blood and fluids, which can produce false pregnancy hormones at any time. She also instructed, as in a future tense, I can’t use home pregnancy test due to false readings and will have to come in to confirm anytime I may feel I could be pregnant. She ended the conversation saying there was nothing more they could do for me on this matter and pretty much told me to charge it to the game (pretty much get over it)
My heart is hurting in knowing the fact that PCOS had added more obstacles for me and my family.. I wouldn’t wish this on my worse enemies. This condition can drag you so low. I’m not going to lie to you all and tell you that I am okay, as I write this I’m fighting my tears so that I can convey this story. I’m being very vulnerable in this post. It hurts to know that in my future for children it’s going to be even more rough. So hear me clearly if you’re able to have children please don’t take that for granted. A lot of women are dealing with infertility issues or may be in my shoes dealing with a tough road to even think about another child. Please don’t tell us it will happen eventually. We all can’t just do it one night and boom we’re pregnant. A lot of us have to do body temperature everyday , fertility shots, fertility pills, constant checkups, money wasted on home pregnancy test, high hopes, broken dreams, lack of sleep, constant period app checks or some of us has issues with false hormones do to cysts. Don’t get me wrong I am happy to be blessed with our daughter, but to know that one of the most important gift of a woman can so easily be taken from us.. it’s hard. No woman will ever be prepared to hear or deal with this matter. I’m happy for the women that are having babies and all, but just know do not ever find it okay to tell any woman who is dealing with infertility or any thing of the sorts just to wait or you’re just overthinking it. We hear it enough from our lazy doctors.
On that note, my heart is heavy and will take me a minute to bounce back. But I will be okay, I just have to lace up my combat boots and handle it. To my cystsister we got this! I look forward in walking in the PCOS walk next month and encouraging my family and friends to join my team or wear teal and tag me in a post next month! Thank you all for reading and supporting me and my goal is to be a better advocate to all the ladies who need a voice on this condition that is still new to scientist and doctors.
If you would like join the walk please PM on Facebook or comment on here and I will find a way to contact you. Thank you.